Max spent a few days at the house recently while changing houses downtown. He brought along what used to be the record clock I made for him. It was a mess. I never did ask specifically what happened, but my guess is he stored it in his car for a bit.
It’s been a long time since I’ve seen a warped record. The last one that warped on me was one I stupidly set in the window of our apartment in Ann Arbor while looking for the sleeve, then forgot it and shut the shade in the dark that night. The next day after school it looked like a Salvador Dali clock. It was unplayable and a total loss.
I suppose that unless you were from the vinyl record era you may not even think about the possibility of a record even getting warped.
Max’s looked like this.
Not good. Poor Three Dog Night.
That is some serious warpage.
I dismantled it, drilled out the spindle hole of “Curtis Mayfield – Superfly” and recreated a clock for Max.
Interestingly, while looking for images of warped records I came across this.
Yes folks, there is a record flattener machine you can buy. Not knowing my conversions of pounds to dollars I had to look it up. I figured it would be expensive, but you know how a hot dog can cost like 50,000 Yen or something like that. Well, the actual retail value of the machine in U.S. bucks: $1,789.81
Sorry Three Dog Night. That is not happening.
I would consider this though.
The Aural Retentive 
That’s a cool bowl…perfect for a mancave!